As pre-adolescents and adolescents mature, there is great pressure to live up to certain societal ideals. Social media in particular shapes what everyone wants to present about themselves, but may never allow young people to present their “true” selves outside of these societal ideas. Young men may face pressure to be strong and athletic, while girls may face pressure to be attractive and desirable. However, it is important to recognize that the worth of your value should lie outside these shallow societal ideals.
Men must learn how to be sensitive and understanding, while girls must learn how to be strong and confident. In order to grow as “good” men and women, you must identify your value intrinsically. You need to find out who you are, and who you want to be. What may help is a conversation with other adolescents who are going through similar struggles with friends, family, and even themselves. Hearing about other perspectives may make it easier to overcome your own struggles.
Building a Connection in Group Counseling
Entering group counseling can be helpful at any age level and at any stage of life. Counseling is not just for people who have a serious problem in their lives. For anybody, counseling can allow growth by helping you identify who you are and where you want to go in life. Especially during adolescence, counseling can help you know who you are and where you stand so that you are not trying to fit into someone else’s ideas of what is right. You are unique, and group counseling allows you to talk to other people going through the same things to find solutions.
For many adolescents, internal battles like depression might not appear in the ways you typically think of as mental illnesses. Adolescents can experience serious struggles from being high achievers and consistently pushing themselves to succeed through stellar grades or sports performance. If parents notice that their children are trying to handle tough problems, they should consider counseling. It is important for parents to communicate with their children and listen to them. Parenting is difficult, and counseling can help find the answers to the questions and concerns that parents and children have.
Find A Group Therapy Session Today
Join Ana Martinez, MA for exclusive girls group therapy sessions as we explore issues like self-awareness, self-empowerment, identity issues and dealing with feelings of "not fitting in".
Each session lasts 1.5 hours and accommodates a wide range of ages including pre-adolescence, adolescence and young adulthood. To find out when our next available girl's group therapy session is scheduled, please contact us today! Call Today for more Information Meet Ana Martinez
Issues for Girls
Nowadays, social media is a great social influence in shaping how girls see themselves and their expectations of themselves. This can lead to much anxiety, depression, and self-doubt as girls try to find who they are.
In order for parents to identify what problems are plaguing their children, there has to be open and deep communication. A conversation that starts with the parent asking “How was your day?” and ends with the child responding “Good” is not a conversation that will allow parents to learn more about their children. Do parents really know what is troubling their child, or are they assuming their child is fine because they said “Good”? Children are very good at pretending to be fine, especially since social media encourages everyone to only express the best parts of themselves. So the key part of identifying that there is a problem with a child is having good communication.
For many parents, this may be difficult because they did not grow up with good communication between themselves and their own parents. Parents must reflect on how they grew up, the misconceptions that shaped them, and identify how they can reverse those misconceptions. This is important because, if parents are living with the misconception, they pass that misconception on and perpetuate a bad cycle. If parents know there were hurt and damage in their lives that was never addressed and worked through, they cannot move forward. Instead, they hurt their children by passing on those negative experiences and hurts.
In order to reverse these issues, parents must begin working on themselves by identifying those issues. Having honest conversations between parents and children about personal experiences is a helpful way to address those issues. Down-to-earth conversations with children in which parents are honest about their own vulnerabilities are important for building connection and progress. Parents should communicate the importance of learning through experience with their children. No matter what mistakes have been made, something can be learned by using the experience to grow and better oneself. Developing a growth mindset is a skill that many children may not yet have. Children may make mistakes and be hard on themselves without seeing how the experience can turn into something positive to learn and grow through. The reality is that we all have to make some mistakes to find out who we are and what we want.
Can Therapy Help?
Parents may find that their children are intimidated or nervous about going to therapy. Clear communication is vital in helping children overcome these feelings. Therapy can be explained as just going to talk to someone, and children should know that if they do not like it, they do not have to come back. When children realize that therapy is about helping them grow and learn by teaching them control over their lives, it can be relieving and the negative feelings may leave.
An important component of therapy is feeling a connection to the therapist, who should be a “good fit” for the client. Every client is unique, and so is every therapist. Determining whether a therapist is the right one requires trying them out by having a session with them. Arrive at the session prepared with questions and concerns that are important to you, such as:
- “How do you work with this problem? What is your experience?
- What theories do you follow to identify and treat problems?
- What do you believe?”
Therapists help clients find solutions and growth by developing clients’ mindsets.
When to See a Therapist
Growth is not a clear-cut, sequential series of steps. Individuals are different, so growth happens through a process. Therapy allows clients to move through problems by talking through feelings, developing identities, dealing with problems, and learning that they are not alone.
Parents should be the ones to guide their children. In order to do so, they must reflect on their own growing pains and identify problems that they would like to work through. Through this self-reflection, parents can help their children.
There are many changes that happen during adolescence, including moodiness. But when the negative emotions seem consistent and ongoing for more than a few days, parents may consider seeking help. It is better for children to enter counseling to ensure their well-being than to have their problem fester and become worse.
We are ready to help
Ana Martinez, M.A. is a Marriage and Family Therapist specializing in relationships with adolescents, couples and families. Ana received a B.A. from the University of California, Santa Cruz in Psychology, with an emphasis in Child Development in 2000. She then completed her M.A. in 2003 from Phillips Graduate Institute with a double major in both Psychology/Marriage and Family Therapy and School Counseling.
Contact us today and speak directly with Ana about the Girls Group Therapy Sessions to learn more.
1-818-395-2831
Parents Seeking Child Therapy
Parents may feel intimidated at the thought of revealing their vulnerabilities to the therapist. However, the therapist works slowly over time to learn about the client and build trust. Clients only disclose as much information as they feel safe disclosing that week, and the next week, they may choose to disclose more information. As the client works through the different problems, scenarios, fears, and insecurities, their relationship with the therapist builds and they feel more confident. Therapy is not about disclosing every secret at once, but about a slow process. Sometimes, clients will enter therapy with what they believe to be the problem and leave realizing that there is an entirely separate problem that they are working on. Clients should try to be confident in the therapeutic process and enter without biases or fear of being judged.
Parents Seeking Child Therapy
Parents may feel intimidated at the thought of revealing their vulnerabilities to the therapist. However, the therapist works slowly over time to learn about the client and build trust. Clients only disclose as much information as they feel safe disclosing that week, and the next week, they may choose to disclose more information. As the client works through the different problems, scenarios, fears, and insecurities, their relationship with the therapist builds and they feel more confident. Therapy is not about disclosing every secret at once, but about a slow process. Sometimes, clients will enter therapy with what they believe to be the problem and leave realizing that there is an entirely separate problem that they are working on. Clients should try to be confident in the therapeutic process and enter without biases or fear of being judged.
Some parents may feel fear at bringing their children and themselves to therapy due to negative events that happened in their own childhood. However, part of becoming a parent means reflecting on one’s own childhood to heal the cycle of hurt and become a better parent to one’s child. Children may bring out both the best and worst in their parents, including painful memories. But entering therapy and talking about those memories can help the parent grow as much as the child.